Happiness And an Introvert

Silence is something more than just a pause; it is that enchanted place where space is cleared and time is stayed and the horizon itself expands.

(Pico Iyer , The Eloquent Sounds of Silence)

What Is an introvert

When we talk about one of the human personality types so-called introverts, I will go with the crowd that it is a destiny for humans as social creatures to be raised by a family, and educated in public schools.

While interacting with others, thrive in a way to support themselves, and at the end of the rainbow, meet someone, share the value of life, and produce more people to prevent the world from extinction. 

Somehow for an introvert like me, there are moments to reflect. From the point of view of non-introverts, our journey does not fit the idea of a social creature. Non-introverts wrap their heads around the idea that our habit is against nature, perplexing, socially distant, mysteriously reserved, and miserably friendless. 

I shall say this is quite a non-convincing truth. Being an introvert is an exceptionally gifted rational characteristic that befalls us of nature rather than of habit. 

What makes someone become an introvert?

Scientists obtrusively suggest that being an introvert comes naturally as a package in the brain cellular from born, alongside the cultural influence, social surroundings, and upbringing process -as per the study by the University of Amsterdam in 2005-.

I have been labeled an introvert due to my reluctance to mingle with people. From my small number of friends, my reluctance to join social platforms, and how I spent my weekends and spare time.  

How does an introvert cope with society?

Research apart, the fact that I was raised among extroverts failed to make me one. However, in certain circumstances, introvert like me can plunge into an extrovert mode with the consent of others who wants to see me do social more. Just because I don’t want to look awkward and snobby in a social gathering where I or my significant other become the central point. 

That affects how I earn my living by selecting a job that least interacts with new people. Years ago, when life got hard, and I applied for every job available, I landed a job as an assistant reporter for national coverage.

That was for me a spectacular phase in life. Considering that I won’t be able to talk with random people or officials by being over-friendly to get the best sides of the story by forcing myself to be somebody I am not. Miraculously I managed it for many years, although going back to that job is unthinkable. 

Are introverts the least happy people?

I will say no to that question for many reasons. Introverts are not the least happy people on the planet. That is the spectacle for the extroverts who challenge us with their baffling responses. 

Introverts only need to be alone in harmony in our cozy corners where we can let our guard down, mind our own business, deal with life issues or meditate while demons and angels fight inside our heads, leisurely drawing us back from all the chaos in the world.

Introverts are not social-freaks

Subsequently, what may downcast introverts is when people implicate us as social freaks, and for introverts maintaining a decent composure to deal with such infliction is somewhat important. Thus, outsider opinions tolerably matter to a certain degree. 

More than anything, how to politely argue that we are under no obligation to fulfill other people’s expectations. When annoying questions are raised on our faces about our oblivious behavior, such as ‘Why do you hide in your cave all the time?’, or for example, some of my neighbors playfully call me bride every time I go out on small talk with them. Others will say, ‘Hey look, we finally managed to see the moon shining after a couple of months!”. 

Talking about the manner and subtlety of a decent person, in whatever circumstances of the surroundings, introverts are mostly empathetic, approachable, excellent listeners, situationally aware, and sensible. 

In my case, when people start to judge my sanity as seclusive, snobby, and ignorant of my surroundings. I take time to figure out how to deal with this psychological state of mine. I conclude that introverts do not need therapy or mental care. Needless to explain, being an introvert is not a mental health problem, as we engage positively with the outside world in our unique ways. 

Staying happy as an introvert

Contrary to popular belief, being alone is not the same as being lonely. I am not feeling bored chilling at home alone for days long, going all and about myself, or just with a handful of familiar people with whom I feel comfortable from the heart. 

For introverts, it is psychologically very nurturing to reduce like a hermit to find strength in silence. However, we don’t refuse to go out to a café or gatherings nor mind ambient noise. We attend weddings or funerals. What we avoid is a direct nuisance to us and our personal space, or being in awkward gatherings that we find rather disconnecting. 

Being an introvert is not a misery. It is a natural quality of our thoughts to select a way to adjust to life. As for my journey, it has been some time since I stopped pretending to be someone I am not, to impress people who don’t understand my solicitude.

Still, I cherish and keep those who do. In our short precious time, everyone lives to seek happiness. I believe so long as we behold our strong moral compass, the best way to live our life is to be the natural us and be grateful for every gifted moment. 

Apri Abakar

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